dining with the students

Dan and I were invited to have dinner at one of my student's family's houses during the vacation.  The mom had pulled over one day after dropping her daughter off at school to ask me if
I wouldn't be opposed to having dinner at their house one night.  Sure, I said.  After all, a Fulbrighter never turns down an invitation!  My student discreetly slipped me a note a few days later reminding me about the invitiation, with a phone nubmer to call and make a date.
Then, we went to Maroc and I forgot to call.  Upon our return, I tried to call to set a date and time.  The man on the other end of the line was a little perplexed about this "Louise" I kept mentioning, but kindly let me babble on for a minute before he informed me that I must have made an error and that there was no Louise who lived there.  I'm sure that made for some exciting dinner conversation:
Honey, who was that?
I don't know.  Some foreigner who was looking for a Louise...
Hmmm?!?
Shame and fear of repeating the same mistake made me wait another day to call again.  This time, success, a dinner date was in the future.
It could't have been more enjoyable.  Although, I must admit that Dan and I are getting much more confortable in what many would consider awkward situations.  Perhaps they no longer seem awkward, or maybe we just don't care any more...We had a lovely time with my students and their very friendly parents.

what is cheating?

I will never get used to the difference of what we perceive as "cheating" in different cultures.  I have explained and reexplained to my students in France that, to me, cheating is looking at another person's paper, asking a friend a questions, flat out asking the teacher what the answer is...I even had one kid get up, walk over to another student, and look dorectly over his shoulder to get the answer!  These are just understood as wrong in our culture.  You don't normally need to remind students in the US what does or does not qualify as cheating.  After reading Margaret's post, I have to say I'm not that surprised with their reactions. 
In the US, cheating is such a bad thing.  I remember that I cheated once, in elementary school.  I'll never forget the shame I felt.  We had those little desks and I had cleverly prepared a little cheat sheet to keep at the edge of the pencil groove.  No matter how hard I tried, I just could not learn the Roman numerals.  (I still don't know them - see? cheating is good for nothing!)   I did slip that little 3x5 notecard out to get my answers, but I was so ashamed of myself and felt even worse when I get the test back.  I don't think it was perfect, but I couldn't even be happy with the grade that I had gotten.  Anyway, I digress.  Point is, I don't think the little Frenchies have the same moral compass that we do.  They just don't see it as cheating.  It might be part of their "systeme D," a way to get things done, bend the rules if need be. 
It drives me crazy but I know that no matter how worked up I get, I will not change their view of cheating. What is cheating to me is simply a part of the test-taking process to them, I guess.  They must be as baffled by my reaction as I am by their chatter during a test.  *sigh*  At least it makes for good impressions and reenactments.  A typical test day goes like this...
me:  Jeanne!  I said no cheating!
her:  But Madame, I am not cheating!
me:  You just looked at her paper and asked her a question!
her:  Yes. I didn't know how to write that word!
me:  It's a TEST - that IS the test - to know that word!!!
her:  (blank stare, big, blinking eyes)
me:  Just..... get back to work!!!